Seconds

I can still hear your first birth cry

I’d like seconds please

How tiny in my arms you lay

I’d like seconds please

You looked at me with bright blue eyes

I’d like seconds please

The first time that you laughed at me

I’d like seconds please

Your first steps and first words

I’d like seconds please

Your eventful first year of life

I’d like seconds please

Now how your platinum hair catches raes 

I’d like seconds please

Today you’re two and cuddly two

I’d like seconds please

You’re sweet and smart and kind and bright

I’d like seconds please

And thirds

And fourths

Seconds of all those too

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Perception, Not Reality

You think my life is easy

But you don’t even know

How far I’ve had to come

Nor how far I’ve yet to go

You take my stoicism

To mean I feel no pain

But if you ever felt this way

My friend you’d be lame

You say things well in meaning

But in context ignorant

Then upon upset reception

Accuse of malcontent

Just because the way it looks

Is all that you can see

Means you aren’t really looking

Aren’t empathizing with me

So keep your toxic comments

And self righteous indignation

I’ve no time for your ego

So practice flagellation

Your view is perception

That’s all you can see

Your perception is

Not reality.

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Fighting Father

You’ll never know all the tears that I’ve cried
You’ll never know the pain I feel inside
You’ll never hear me say how much my heart aches
You’ll never see the toll each day without you takes
It’s been a lifelong dream
To open the world and give you everything
It’s otherworldly
To hold you close while you look up at me
I’ve never known a love before
Like the love for a daughter I adore
It makes me wanna dance and sing
When you cry you tug at my heartstrings
And every day apart
Hurts a little more in my heart
You are the world to me
Even through the pain and all the struggle
I love to hear you call for “daddy”

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Icarus Not

It was not I who dare to fly
Setting wings to touch the sky
But heaven opened at my call
Down poured out rains o’er all
And I’ve forgotten my umbrella.

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Light of Change

Things will not remain as they seem
Permanence exists only in dreams
No matter how horrific the score
There will be another round
A new voluminous chapter in store
Make the best of the time present now
How quickly stolen someway or somehow
All that’s left to do is progress
Write new history with each moment’s pass
Try not to dwell too long on regret
Shining bright ahead is not an end
But a beginning of a different trend
It’s not a light just of hope without pain
Not just remembrance of all we’ve lost
That light is a light
A rainbow
Of
Change

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Blind Reflection

I’ve never ever known

How I got through what I did

Impossible and improbable

Always mystified and terrified

So uncertainty is nothing new

God will carry me through

Just taking life one step at a time

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Positive Momentum

I’m feeling better with each passing day
The color’s coming back where there had been gray
I can’t help but smile
It’s been quite a while
Since I really felt that I’d be alright
Sorry you didn’t keep me down
Sorry that I’ve come around
From here on out I know that I’m better off
So when you strike me now you’ll just see scoff
I’m a better father than you ever thought
And I’m here in spite of how hard you fought
So now I hope you find
Whatever gives you peace of mind
But it won’t be overcoming me
I bear no hate because I’m finally free

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